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Sunday, October 9th, 2005
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7:08 pm - Well, hi.
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I can't lie and say I lost my computer. It's too big, and lying's just awful anyway.
I've just been busy. And missing a few people, to be honest. I'm looking forward to the games this month. Residency's starting up for the game against Australia. I'm glad to have some old faces back. (I do mean old too. Ha.)
And if any of you Broncos say anything about today's game in Chapel Hill, my response won't be very polite.
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| Wednesday, August 3rd, 2005
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12:50 pm - Well, crap.
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1. Reply with your name and I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you what song/movie/book/fictional character reminds me of you.
3. I'll pick a flavor of pudding to wrestle with you in. (Just for the record: I think this question is stupid.)
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me.
5. I'll tell you my favorite memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what animal or plant you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. You MUST. It is written.
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| Saturday, July 23rd, 2005
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12:11 am
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So I haven't been keeping up on things, but they've been busy. I have, I mean. Like I said the last time, we played Canada, and we won. Then there was the Ukraine, and Millie got goal number 100 in front of her home crowd and it didn't rain, so that was even better.
Now we're playing Iceland on Sunday and training this time is making me feel like things can only improve. There are new faces all the time, except that most of them aren't exactly entirely new. There's this girl, for instance, named Leslie Osborne. Maybe some of you have heard of her. She just made the roster.
Leslie won't be playing with Lindsay, though, because the Nordic cup is happening right now, which is where Lori and Heather are too. They won today, by the way. They've got a game on Sunday, too. (But it won't be on TV, so don't feel bad when you tune into mine instead. Which you should be. At 2pm PT on ESPN2.)
If ya'll can't tell by now, I'm just assuming you don't know anything about what's been going on with soccer anywhere and so I'll just cover it all.
Real Madrid played the LA Galaxy just this past Monday. The American boys lost, but there were some good moments and I'm pretty sure David Beckham winked at me. (Shush, he did.)
Oh, and so apparently if your roommate comes home to find a Leslie on your bed, they're going to give you a weird look. I never guessed.
And if you like my voice, for whatever reason, there's also this interview here you might be a little interested in.
current mood:  content
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| Sunday, June 26th, 2005
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6:13 pm
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So, we won. And that was awesome.
I saw Jules at the game. We didn't talk much, but it was nice just seeing her. I'll have to listen to the game later on and hear how she does with commentary. Considering she has so much practice talking, I'm sure it was good.
I'll talk more about the game itself later. (I bet some of you didn't even know I had a game. That's how busy I've been. I've got training to do! I don't have time to write!)
But right now I've got dinner plans.
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| Friday, May 27th, 2005
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11:56 pm - This post is sort of mixed up, I guess.
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Happy birthday, Leslie. Your present's in the mail, but I don't know if it got there today. (Don't get too excited. It's nothing big.)
Um. And it feels like anything I could say about Mark would sound dumb or maybe selfish somehow, but it's honest to say that he's in my prayers. (And I don't mean that in a morbid way. So don't worry.) I'm glad ya'll won.
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| Wednesday, May 25th, 2005
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12:12 am
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I kept telling Mark I was going to write about soccer, and since he can't even keep up with what state I'm in unless I do, here it goes.
Right now I'm in Jersey most of the time and for most of the rest of the summer, staying at Heather's, even when she's not here. Mostly this is just because she wanted Tarp to be here and then I guess she felt guilty and offered me the left over room.
Also her parents are real nice and they think my accent's cute.
So I'm playing for the Wildcats all summer. There's a profile here that's smooshed up with a non-existent photo outline that makes me look like a man. A bald man.
Like Kylie already said, I had a really good game that I'm proud of, but I'm more proud of the fact that right now we're on a shutout streak, after four games, and we intend to keep it going. It's not really the same as playing the Algarve Cup to a shutout, but no game is ever the same, so that's already expected.
Oh, and last Friday, Heather got four goals and then couldn't shut up about it, or anything else. She sings worse than I do, and that's pretty bad.
current music: not my CD because I think Heather took it
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| Friday, May 20th, 2005
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11:59 pm - A question.
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I honestly hope that this doesn't end up offending anyone (because personally I'm kind of tired of talking about this stuff and thinking about it in general) and so I'm sorry to bring it up again, but there's something I'm definitely not sure about and I think it's an important question, so:
How does everyone define "homophobe" or "homophobia"?
I really mean that, because like with something like "racist" or "racism," you know exactly what it means. Or like with "arachnophobia," there's no real way to misinterpret that. But some people say "homophobia" meaning discomfort with the concept of homosexuality as a practice and then other people use it to mean dislike of homosexuals as people, and then there are even other, more extreme definitions. And since a couple of different people were using the word to define a couple of other different people (and sometimes themselves), I for one would at least like to know what everyone means.
Don't answer if you don't want to, but I'm curious to hear from as many people as want to.
current mood:  I'm feeling curious, I said so
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| Tuesday, May 10th, 2005
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8:31 pm - It feels like I'm just repeating myself.
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Even though I'm sure all of ya'll are keeping up to date on your Swedish "football" matches and this is probably all just old news, I'm going to talk about it anyway.
Now Kate (Sobrero) Markgraf is... well, she's old, for one thing. (Even older than CP.) In fact, she's one of the most senior defenders we've got playing for us right now. She's been capped close to 150 times.
But in all that time, she's never scored a goal for us. (Although there was that one time supposedly at a practice where she broke her jaw in the process...) Right now, she's in Sweden, playing for Orebro (with Lil).
Just a few days ago, Sobby scored.
I was just reading what Lil had to say about that, this part in particular:You know we all dream about scoring a goal and wondering if it really changes your life or really matters that much, well I think it does matter. It matters, but it doesn't change anything about you, but it does help your team and that is what we are all out here to do. I think as a team we all were excited for the goal and deep down think Kate is happy but Kate is also just as happy or even more so, when she can shut down a player and make sure no balls go in the back of our net. To me, that's really important. When you score a goal on our team, it's not just yours, it's everyone's. That's the US mentality, I think, and that's what makes us so strong, really. We have this really strong sense of unity and commitment to each other and our team.
You can find that sort of thing everywhere, really.
In the Bible, God teaches us to deny some of the things we want to work toward the preservation of our souls. Sacrifice for the greater good. Even on Saturday morning cartoon shows, like Batman, you have people sacrificing parts of themselves and their own happiness for the happiness and success of others. It's the right way to live. It makes sense.
So I've got this decision to make right now. And my problem is people keep telling me I should do what makes me happy and what feels right, but I don't know how to find out what that is when any choice I make feels like it won't be for the greater good, or it will really hurt someone.
I'm not sure what the right choice is, which I guess is just because there is no real "us" and "them." There's just me and then there's these other people who could end up hurt by my choices and it's insane, really, that life should work this way.
I've been praying for clarity lately, but it hasn't come yet. Not that I'm trying to be impatient. I mean, I am sort of already, but I'm kind of praying for patience, too. I just hope that writing about it will help clarify some things on my own. God can only do so much for us before we have to get off our butts and work things out for ourselves.
current mood:  contemplative
current music: Bebo Norman - "You Surround Me"
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| Friday, May 6th, 2005
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7:51 am
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I don't need if I'm starting to look lazy because I don't write as much as I did at first, but there have been a lot of things happening lately that I haven't wanted to talk about (at least not here) or sometimes there are so many things happening that I forget to.
Like one thing I haven't mentioned is, even if there are some people who think my action photos look better than they do, I still can't totally undersatnd why I'm on the paperback cover of Anson's book. Is it just because I came back to Chapel Hill? I should come back more often. Maybe someday someone will build me a statue.
By the way, I'm still here. CP hasn't kicked me out yet (but I'm expecting it just about any day now). I got Kyles to go to church with me last Sunday.
I also really enjoyed Miss Congeniality 2 when we saw it.
( Note to self, which goes under here because otherwise it'll probably look stupid. )
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| Friday, April 22nd, 2005
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8:57 am
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One of the five questions someone asked me in my last post was what was something that I wanted as a kid that I never got. I said that I never got as many answers as I wanted.
The truth is, I don't get very many answers now, but I've learned more patience. It's not my place to question as much as I might want to. With enough faith and trust, you can let yourself find out things in their own due time. That's the kind of thing that comes with maturity. I think so, anyway.
( Some more stuff. )
My hair's a mess this morning. That comes from sleeping on the floor, I guess. I’m a little indignant, considering CP switched to the couch sometime in the middle of the night and I'm pretty sure that's cheating or breaking some kind of slumber party etiquette. Her hair looks better than mine!
current music: it sounds like someone making breakfast?
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| Friday, April 15th, 2005
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2:32 pm
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I once saw this thing in someone's journal where they said you could ask them any five questions and they would answer them, but then you'd have to do the same in your journal. Like, you'd have to let other people ask you five questions, and so on.
So ask me any five questions and I promise to answer truthfully.
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| Thursday, April 14th, 2005
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6:06 pm
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A very smart friend of mine once said that loving someone isn't about possessing them. I think she meant that when you love someone, you have to try hard to love them enough to move beyond feelings like jealousy. This has a lot to do with another good book I just finished reading, but I'll talk about that more later.
I'm back in Chapel Hill, and staying with CP. The flight was okay.
That's all for now.
current mood: contemplative
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| Wednesday, April 13th, 2005
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2:30 am - Since I proimsed...
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| Saturday, April 2nd, 2005
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11:14 pm
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I thought about writing up a post yesterday about my one-tine encounter with those carnies. Boy, that sure was good times. Gymnasts are flexible! (Edit: Even with the handcuffs on.)
But then my modesty overcame me. It's tricky like that.
Otherwise, there's actually a lot of serious, major stuff going on, but I don't want to talk about it here, at least not now.
I just finished reading a really great book: Fried Green Tomatoes at the Whistlestop Cafe. Ya'll should check it out.
current mood: pretty good
current music: Kylie Minogue - "Love at First Sight"
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| Sunday, March 27th, 2005
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11:53 pm - I'm sorry this is so long.
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( Consider this my Biblical verse of the... weekend, I guess. )
I keep thinking I should write something about my weekend. It's one of the more important weekends of the year for me. I mean, it's a big deal with all our family getting together and everything -- and not just my relatives and blood family, but the whole communal family of our church.
A lot of it feels too personal, though, especially right now. I upset people before when they thought I was telling them how or what to write in their journals, but the truth is that there are just some things I don't write, and that's how they stay.
But the other stuff, I can talk about.
Like, how Les is afraid of grass stains (who'd have thought) and she sleeps in late on Easter morning because she's up all night at the Vigil. (I guess that's just a Catholic sleep schedule.)
This morning I woke up real early, got dressed, and headed over to church with mom, and Kara, too. (I thought at first that she was going to regret it. We were just decorating some of the class rooms at first, but then we went out to the back to hide eggs and she really seemed to start having fun.)
Yeah, so we do an egg hunt for the kids during the service, and this year I was helping mom with that. (I've done it with her the past few many years.) And afterward there's some candy, too, but not much because we can't be sure how much parents want their kid to eat. Mostly it's just a few Hershey kisses and then we split the kids up into groups and we sit outside and talk about our faith.
I talked to them a bit about how the egg hunt is symbolic of what happens every Easter, how Christians all over the world have to go looking for their faith again. Sometimes it's tricky (I'm getting pretty good at hiding, okay) and sometimes it's real easy, because maybe the egg's especially bright and it sticks out in the grass or against the brick wall. And then there are people who don't bother looking, and then after a little time, you start to notice the smell that comes with faith left to go rotten.
The kids think that part's funny.
Then everybody trades off eggs with each other until they're all happy and we go inside to eat them with some juice, and then mom talks to them about how faith is like an egg because you've got to crack it. She talks about baby chicks busting out of the shell, and she actually brought this cute little stuffed one that one little boy almost ripped the head off of, he was so excited.
It's funny, I guess, because when I was about ten or eleven I didn't want to do the egg hunt anymore. That was back when I was still looking for them, and I started thinking I was just too big, you know? So I'd stay inside and listen to the grown up service, because it made me feel so smart and special. Like maybe I thought the adults got to hear a super secret lesson about God that would make me so much smarter and more spiritual than all my friends, you know, and it would be like my soul had aged five years in one day.
But mostly, I got bored. (Yeah, at eleven, even I got bored in church sometimes.) For the next few years I tried it, just still staying when the kids left to go playing their little kid games, but I didn't like Easter as much as I used to, and I knew I didn't like it as much as I was supposed to. So then, when I was about fourteen, my mom asks me to hide the eggs with her, and...
You know, people are right about how those kids running around on Easter morning don't really get what they're celebrating yet. They don't understand how important the day is and how much Jesus suffered for them, but today I was helping around this little boy who'd only just learned to walk about a month ago, and you should've seen the look on his face when he found an egg all by himself. (It was yellow and sparkly and stuck on a wooden step, but it was still impressive detecting, I think.)
So I understand how this whole weekend's about Jesus and His sacrifice, but it's just as much about what He was sacrificing for, and just trust me, I saw that in that kid's smile today. He had dimples.
And I swear, this isn't me passing judgment on anyone, so don't anyone get offended.
Also, the marshmallow jelly beans are definitely better than the cherry.
current mood: content
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| Tuesday, March 22nd, 2005
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11:21 pm
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You know, I complained before about someone harassing me about shoes, but she was probably right.
There. I said it.
I want a contract with Adidas.
Do you want to know why?
Because then I too could be this cool.
I'll give you a moment to fully appreciate that thought.
Okay, so there was some stuff in my journal and... I guess maybe I should address it or how I feel about it. But I won't say much right now.
I'm sorry if I upset people. I'm sorry if I offended people. (The reason I warned about it maybe being offensive at the top is I was hoping anyone who thought they might get offended would know and then they wouldn't have to read it, but I guess that's not what happened.)
I don't know, maybe I should explain myself or what I meant, that might make people feel better, but I just can't right now.
Instead, I watched some footage earlier from the trip to New York after Athens. The whole team, we came to the city and were on a whole bunch of TV shows to just talk about the Olympics and what an honor it was. The whole trip was great. I like the subways; they're cool.
But anyway, so I was watching this stuff and I realized that maybe a lot of you don't know me very well. I mean, you probably don't, because I'm not in your sport. But I've seen people posting a lot of links to interviews with them and stuff and thinking about the time just after Athens reminded me of this stuff. It's a bunch of interviews four of us did with Nike, and it was a real honor to be chosen with people as talented as Abby, Mia, and Boxxy.
I don't know, I just thought some of ya'll might find it interesting. Especially Mia. She's always so articulate and gracious.
current mood:  okay
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| Monday, March 21st, 2005
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11:48 pm
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This is probably going to be offensive.
( See, I know how to use cut tags. )
I'm not going to talk about how my Palm Sunday went. It was good and everything, but I already kind of upset someone talking about the stuff I thought over, and it was more their business than anyone else's.
The women's basketball brackets all went to crap tonight and if UConn loses tomorrow, I might just stop watching.
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| Tuesday, March 15th, 2005
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4:08 pm
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I'm feeling nervous, but mostly it's a good kind of nerves.
The cup's been going well and now we're playing Germany tonight. Except it won't be night where a lot of ya'll are, it's the afternoon, at 3:15 EST. (If you want to keep up with it, for whatever reason, there's going to be a matchtracker up at www.ussoccer.com.)
We've been playing really well, and the last game was just so nice, how it felt like everything was fitting right because everyone was working together perfectly. There's that expression "like clock-work"? Well, it applied at the time, I think.
Germany's a whole different story, though.
I mean, we'll be fine, it's just different. I'm really impressed with some of the new girls working in the back and the older girls I'm used to aren't too bad either. (I still think it was kind of great to have Lori playing back here with me instead of playing up front like usual, even if it was a little weird.)
I've got to go now. It's getting kind of close to game time.
Wish us luck.
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5:49 am
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I took this from someone else's journal, which is probably unfair because I didn't ask him any questions, but I might later if I think of some.
Um. So ask me any four or so questions you like. I'll answer them honestly. But if I do then you've got to post this in your journal according to the same rules.
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| Sunday, March 13th, 2005
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11:47 pm - It's story time.
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This is a story about our founding fathers. (It's not really. But ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) kylie_bivens can get really pushy, and this is what comes of that.)
It used to be tradition that when these men would all get together in Portugal, they'd go pottery shopping together. (What I mean is that they would go, as a group, to buy pottery from local places.)
Then one year, all of that changed.
Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, and John Hancock had all moved on to other things, leaving Alexander Hamilton in charge of things. He was pretty good at what he did, but then one day, when the time for shopping for pottery rolled around, he invited an Indian to come along.
Now we all know how our founding fathers feel about liberty and the pursuit of happiness for all peoples, including the indigenous ones, but a tradition amongst a group of guys should stay amongst that group of guys and Alex's suggestion got vetoed, especially by Maddy (James Madison, for those of you not in the know), who thought there wouldn't be room in the van-- I mean, the wagon.
Alex almost pouted for a while, but then someone bought him a pot and gave him a flavored slushi and he was happy again.
This now concludes our historic story.
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